Haiku Review: MCU Edition
Everybody else is doing it.
NAH.
23. Hulk
Too much CGI
And joyless, like its villain —
Roth … was a bad choice.
22. Thor: The Dark World
Too dark, gloomy, and,
Ms. Portman notwithstanding,
A chore to look at.
MEH.
21. Iron Man 2
Sort of surprising
That RDJ could sleepwalk
Through all the chaos.
20. Dr. Strange
Liked the second act
And the ending was clever.
I forgot the rest.
19. Spider-Man: Far from Home
It’s hard to believe,
But here’s a Marvel premise
I thought was far-fetched.
18. Thor
It’s uneven, but
I get what they were trying.
And it’s never dumb.
HMM.
17. Captain Marvel
A feminist work
More “admirable” than good.
I love the 90s.
16. Iron Man 3
The first half: boring.
Second half: kick-ass. The end:
A giant plot hole.
15. Ant-Man and the Wasp
A lot of fun, if
You don’t think hard about it.
Not enough heart, though.
14. Spider-Man: Homecoming
Quite charming, in a
John-Hughes-does-capes kind of way.
Michael Keaton rules.
13. Avengers: Age of Ultron
The dizzying highs!
The frustrating lows! But hey,
When it works, it WORKS.
YES.
12. Captain America: Civil War
Kind of rote, and yet
The sheer spectacle makes it
So rewatchable.
11. Ant-Man
I’m a sucker for
A good heist movie. Paul Rudd:
He’s so likeable!
10. Black Panther
Not a banger, but
this film disguised as “tentpole”
Is just important.
AHA!
9. Guardians of the Galaxy
“Avengers in space”
Is light, funny and fast-paced,
If awfully weird.
8. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
Like most families,
It’s kind of heavy-handed,
But you still love it.
7. Iron Man
The Hero’s Journey
has been told before, often,
But rarely so well.
6. Captain America: The First Avenger
This story’s heart beats
So strong, and so loud, you might
Miss how good it looks
YAY!
5. Avengers Infinity War
Like a chess open,
It slowly closes ’round you
Then just knocks you out
4. The Avengers
This one worked so well
Every other studio
Keeps copying it.
3. Thor: Ragnarok
A rich and stunning
Sci-fi action comedy.
They figured out Thor!
2. Avengers Endgame
Yes, it’s fan service.
But that service is top-notch.
I still get the feels.
1. Captain America: The Winter Soldier
A kick-ass action-
political-thriller film
That stands on its own.